Bria and Mummy are missing Daddy already. Daddy just left for a one week business trip to KL and Bangkok. Then next week, Daddy will fly off again to Jakarta for 3 days. And late next month, Daddy will be going for 3 weeks of reservice. Sigh... = (
I haven't been able to stop thinking about how i am leaving baby alone with C at home. Work has been really busy so far, but it's still not able to occupy my mind entirely. This thought is always lingering in my mind. As much as I want to trust C cause she is a good helper, there is this part of me that feel bad and uneasy about leaving my baby at home alone with her for so many hours over so many days. I did speak to my boss about it and she said I could work from home if i wanted. Problem was, we had 2 new interns coming to join us this week, so i had to do some presentations to them today and tomorrow. Plus, i have some meetings lined up tomorrow and Friday, which leaves me only Wed and Thursday to work from home. I am supposed to be one of the intern's buddy, so part of me also feel bad that i just leave her alone after 2 days if i work from home. Then again, my baby is more important!
Dad and Mom came over today and we had dinner together. My stroke-stricken Dad offered to come over every day to spot check on C and play with Bria, but i told him not to. C asked my Dad why I didn't inform her about his visit. I hope she don't feel that I don't trust her.! Actually, I do trust her. It's just that i feel bad leaving Bria alone without her mummy and daddy for so many days. It's like I am not a good mummy. Usually, Bria sees K in the daytime when he works from home, and then she sees both of us in the evening when i come back from work.
But now, Bria won't be seeing either of us in the daytime for one whole week... Poor baby. Hopefully I can schedule all my meetings so i can work from home on Wed and Thur.
Over dinner, Mom commented on how I can be so assured about leaving Bria at home alone with C. Having heard too many horror "maid stories", i can't blame her for being so paranoia. Yet at the same time, I felt so irritated. I asked her what other suggestions she had and she kept quiet. Sometimes, I feel so bitter about why my parents and in-laws are not willing to help take care of their grandchild. They only know how to nag at us and ask for grandchildren. But they are not willing to retire and take care of the baby when she's born. I won't be surprised if they start asking for another one soon. Then the big question is: Who is going to take care? Are they expecting me to quit my job? Or get another helper? And if i get another helper, will everybody feel comfortable leaving the baby alone with the helper?
I am not sure if I should be thankful that I don't have relatives taking care of my baby. At least with C, I can have my own way of raising and educating Bria. None of all those nonsense where I get unhappy with the way the old folks bring up my daughter etc. etc. Plus, I get to make sure she is only exposed to proper English. Well, i guess there's always two sides to a coin eh?
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