Last weekend, I invited some friends over to our place for a National Day party. Before K and I went to New Zealand, we actually had one similar party where everyone came dressed in white or red, and we even had a cake in the shape of the flag, and we would sing Happy Birthday too! But ever since we went to New Zealand, and I had Bria, we didn't celebrate for the past 2 years.
This year, we did not have any cake, but we ordered KFC and Pizza, and played Wii until 2am in the morning.
While chit chatting, one of my friends asked me how is life different as a mom. That question left me thinking for the past few days. My reply to my friend was that it's very different, cause as a mom, i have to think for my baby in everything that I do. No more thinking of myself and being selfish. Well, it's selfish in a different way. Selfish not for myself, but for my baby. Which is true. In fact, sometimes, i think i am so selfish for Bria that I become a bit scary.
Like recently, when K fell sick, the first thing that came to my mind was that he will spread his germs to Bria. When i think about it, it's quite sad. It's like baby first, then hubby. But i can't help it. I hope K doesn't feel neglected! I know he loves Bria, but it's very very different, a mother's love and the love of a father.
I'm also being all paranoid over the whole 7th month thingie, so this whole month, i won't bring Bria outdoors after dusk. Plus, I'm not going for any after-office events and business dinners now. Not sure if i will miss out on any opportunities from all the informal networking, but i couldn't care less. K's birthday is coming in 2 weeks, and I am actually thinking of just celebrating at home, cause i don't want both him and Bria to go out at night. In case he falls sick again. Good thing is, K also don't want to celebrate this year. He's going for 3 weeks re-service a day after his birthday. What a bummer! If I were him, I won't have the mood to celebrate either!
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